Dating for People with Disabilities and its Challenges

Dating for people with disabilities has been considerably simplified with dedicated sites catering to people with all common and many uncommon disabilities. Such sites do not just have people with disabilities. There are people who would have no problems in dating someone with a disability. While it is convenient now to meet likeminded people and to go out on a date, some challenges remain and they must be addressed to pave the way for satiating dating for disabled people. It is a little difficult to discuss the entire spectrum of challenges as some would be relevant in specific cases but a few will be quite generic and applicable to most people. Here are some common challenges pertaining to dating for people with disabilities.

• More often than not, disability becomes the common thread binding two people. There is no harm in letting a disability take center stage and to meet people who have the same disability. This actually helps people to find others who know exactly what they feel or experience. Such a common or shared experience can become a solid foundation for a rewarding relationship. Those who do not share this experience may try their best to relate and may even imagine, truly understand and acknowledge but that may still not be enough in certain cases. While common experiences bind people together, they cannot be the only fuel for the mutual chemistry. There has to be much more than the common or shared experience between two people to become a couple. Even if you were only considering a few dates and not a long term relationship, it cannot be solely on the basis of the disability. Dating for people with disabilities will always be different from dating for people without disabilities but everything other than the disability should be sought after and prioritized with equal zeal.

• Dating for people with disabilities is often confined to two people with the same disability or different disabilities. This is absolutely conducive to both but neither must assume that the other person will have a lucid understanding of their respective disability. If someone has a hearing problem and their date has speech impairment, both can be completely oblivious of the actual experience of one another. It is not uncommon for people with hearing problems to have no understanding of speech or language impairments. Simply because someone has a disability does not make that person a more profound observer, someone who has a great ability to relate to others or someone who is overly compassionate for that matter. It is absolutely possible for a person with no disability to have a much better understanding of a particular condition, something another disabled person may fail to realize. It is best to avoid presuming how well a person understands your disability. Approaching the conversations and the subsequent dates with an assumption that both need time to completely comprehend their respective disabilities is ideal.

• One of the common challenges of dating for people with disabilities is assumed inferiority or superiority. People with disabilities are often considered or treated as inferior by others. Many people who have one or more disabilities are also vulnerable to thinking that they are inferior. They may try and avoid such a thought but at times one fails to rein in the realizations. It is not healthy for anyone if one of the two people on a date has a feeling of superiority or inferiority. Acknowledging the reality does not necessarily lead to a feeling of inferiority or superiority. Both people need to have this simple maturity to have a good time with each other. Inferiority or superiority is not always evident. There may not be any spoken words or obvious actions expressing the inferiority or superiority. One or both may succeed at concealing their true realizations or how they feel. There will be symptoms though. It is not always easy to conceal every moment of feeling inferior or superior. Such moments and feelings should be addressed, sooner than later. If they cannot be avoided, then you must look for someone else who would not feel superior or inferior. In most cases, one person feeling in a certain way will fuel the contrarian realization for the other person.

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